This is an oldie .. But a goodie ... And original version

You are in my lair panic in your eyes Yes you are all MINE!! And its now time for you to relax and unwind My images of you... So very creepy... You should be afraid.. Very afraid.. These images in my mind it is only a matter of time before I begin to eat at my prey Having my way... Silently deceiving

Deviously alluring ALL the embodiments I possess your body in distress and YOU are still most captivated by my charm Ring the Alarm!! For it is time to play my little hypnotizing game, taking my aim you take in all MY pain that is inflicted your way Don't dare try to run and hide or disguise I ALWAYS have my way!!! This is not a game.. I Dare & I DO say pleasure rain Lights Camera Action You are on My display I creep into you in the still of the night lasting till day heavy heavy play AS I Arouse your senses YOu are helpless Begging me to stay wanting me to have my way As I ENCHANT! Goddess in the flesh on your knees before me please! Head down tongue out allowing my spikes to pierce your hot flesh...dripping wet The Spell is set.. You are LOST in my daze with my devilish ways of being Naughty, Wicked and BAD.. I PRICK right into your SKIN... Saturate me within For I DO Demand and I Command absolute & total Submission You NEED my permission, NEED I say more?? For you MUST ENdure my Wrath Pain TOrture PLeasure I am the Ultimate Treasure, I am what you Desire This Ultimate Womanly Power LIVE here in the flesh Mind fucking you BEst till you Bleed.. making you SCream.. Surrendering Rendering Relinquishing All that you are and Will Give to ME For I am Lady Natalia

Uncut train Chant ~~~ field of DreAms

The other night I dreamt I was in my childhood bedroom & I along with someone else & a child were being held there by this being/entity/monster/beast/ scary looking "not human/human" thing

... This being although scary was not too frightening ... He/it had an unclear plan (how my mind processed this attack .. Was 1 that it didn't matter what i tried to do .. This was meant to happen this was the path ) ... The man in my dream

and the child

I knew them .. They were a part of me ... But I couldn't identify them ... 

Although they were there, I didn't really see what they looked like ... 

But I knew them both well .. The child was there but not subjected to what both the man & I were subjected to..  

Itwas as if the child was left there to observe everything

that was happening.. We were all made to sit on top of this bed / mattress .. And we were not to move .. The child in my dream was just like any child. .. Moving around / tossing around / flipping around & behaving very antsy and hyper while there ... The child was not reprimanded in any way

or told to sit still by this "beast".. But if I or the man moved or spoke in any way we were watched intensely.. There was 1 part of the dream that I must of looked as if I was going to attempt to leave or move or go somewhere else .. And the "beast" rushed over demanding from me where I thought I was going ... But I just sat back down comfortably & kept my cool and stayed in my place .... Although in the dream we were being confronted by this "beast" .. I felt safe .. I didn't feel like any of us were in any immediate danger.... Also the guy that I was with in my dream.. Protected me .. It wasn't so much what he did .. It was the connection of our hearts/body/mind where I read from him that we were ok ... This man .. These people ... I loved .. There was 1 point where he just looked at me .. And by his look by his expression .. I felt comforted ... & I remember thinking to myself in my dream ... It's you .. You are the one .... By this point the "beast" returned with these Glass cups for each of us (not the child) just for the man and myself .... Inside these glass cups we were told/made we must finish /drink the contents of what is inside these glass cups ....

I was disgusted by what we were being given .... It was blended into a fine chunky / messy liquid fresh flesh and blood ....

I did not want to drink it ... I even tried to refuse (silently) .. I was thinking of ways I was going to go around & not really drink this ... But the "beast" never took his eyes off me ... The man that was with me ... He drank from the glass cup and pretty much almost finished it ... Encouraging me that it wasn't so bad .. And not to think about it ... In my dream It was understood that this was going to happen .. We were going to drink this .. And there was nothing that could be done about it ... Also another thing I realized upon awakening was that this "beast" he didn't speak ... He didn't even make noise really ... But his presence was "terrifying" in a sense ... Although as much fear as one would imagine having in circumstances such as these .. I was never terrified ... Or fully afraid .. Which I woke up thinking that it was odd ... Cause I have had many "frightening" dreams ...

And I remember feeling afraid and waking up afraid .... But for whatever reason no alarm bells were going off .... Also interesting was in the manner in which the "beast" spoke/expressed itself .... Cause thruOut the dream.. The "beast" was clear in what he demanded from each of us .. But yet no words were spoken at all ... And in the dream although his language was interpreted and understood as words in my brains eye of understanding .... That is not at all how he communicating .. It's as if it was telepathic information.... There were other factors of this dream I know I left out ... But this is the gist of what transpired ... One of my professors whom I shared this with who happens to practice & believe in spirituality and she has her own beliefs and practices that I won't get into now ... But she most definitely had interesting insight into this dream of mine .. Which made perfect sense when she spoke to me .. & I think it's fkn cool !!!! Anyways off the train rockers now .... Field of dreams & nightmares .. Or are they really nightmares ... I guess it is only a matter of perception and understanding ...

Uncut train ride Chants ~~~ puPPeTeAr

Something about you is not real .. Peeling passed the layers of your shears. Mystical corruption ... Puppeteer..

Steady function .. Complete destruction ... For my eyes most certainly do deceive ... Masquerade dance ..

From far away lands .. No matter where I stand .. I dream of you & only you ..

mOoDsHiFTo'haRa's

mOoDsWinGs HaPpeN from time to time ... But then u gEToVeRiT .. just make sure during one of your "MooDsWinGinG" episodes you do not go taking your "frustrations" out on anyone else either.. i LiKe2 wRiTeOuT my FrUsTraTioNs in whichever shape or form ... My way .. My expressionism. ... i aLsO liKe2 DaNceOuT any NeGaTiviTy existing within ME .. LaUgHouTcRyOuTyoGAitOuT 

anything 2make mE FeeLgOoD !!! caLL my bFF my sister .. Speak to god , angels , faeries .. My dogs ... 

You get the picture.. Right ??? No.. Ok how about this .. I like to vent it all out in whatever shape or form that is needed for me to release the mOOdSwiNG / mooDshiFT beast in me .... But until it releases i MoST certainLy DoNoT take my mOoDsWiNgS, aNGeR or frustrations out on aNyBoDy eLse .. if I could at those times i siMPLy kEEP2mySeLF to avoid any "temptations" ... & i grumpily stay in my H.o.L.e until I'm ReADy 2 cLiMBouTTaMyHoLe .. I'm not pErFeCT nor do i pretend 2b either & I understand we aLL have OuR moMenTs (& yes we R aLL entitled2 "our moments" we R in fact eMoTioNaL beings afterALL) & in this department we R ALL the saME so there is NOeXcuSe 2trY & juStiFY UgLY BeHaVoiR .. (unLeSs that's just who u R.. Which is cOOL2.... 2eaCHisOwN i wiLL just persOnaLLy stay cLeaR from u cauSe i2 am not the1.. 

& i am aLL about LoVE anyway) .. 

if uR Having a bADdAy .. Bad week ... Bad year .. Bad life ... ok.. shit is reaL out there .. I get it!! Believe me I get it.. Things happen .. This world can dish out some pretty fkd up cruel things ... & unfortunately Sometimes that's just the way the cOOkieCruMbLeS .. Given this fact ... u stiLL shouLd LeArN how2 DEAL with your issue(s) in whichever way necessary & possible in order 2maKe YoU FeeL bETTer .. But during those X's ... sTAY the fk inside your BuBBLe & don't pASS ur mooDswing around

.. I know the word swing reminds us all of a swing ... One that could be fun for some or not so fun for others either way do not pASs that shit ON !! That's not riGHT (to others ) (to urself) & it's nOt cOOL either !!! (& chances are you won't feel very good about urSeLf after the fact ... & if u do feel better after the fact .. Well then aren't u a twisted little fk.. <<~~ seriously no judgement from me passed ... But really ?!? U would do such a thing .. Just never been my cup of tea ) ... Again to each is own !!!!! But lets say u don't feel good about it but you do NoT kNoW how2 stop it or how to make it better .. Well here's another miNDbLoWeR for you .. .. Maybe It is TiME2 FaCeUrSeLF .. Meet yourself .. Have a little 1on1 u know with YOU .. & dig even Deeper .. Deeper then u thought possible .... & acKnoWLeDgE this not so nice aspect/quality/personality trait about yourself .. & (Ask urself how u truly feel about this "aspect" of urself ) & wOrK @ A BeTTeR soLuTioN for yourself & for others ... Are you operating outside of LOVe? These are the processes most of us tend to ignore because we are so fixated with just moving along & not feeling a damn thing ...(because emotions are hard to deal with ... They touch a part of ourselves that sometimes is not very comfortable of a place to be in ) so instead We sweep everything under the rug & do nothing About it ... Allowing for this seed to be planted .. Marinated & birthed into a much uglier existence ... One that we may find harder to identify later on down the road. Working on processes like this .. within ourselves... help build our own personal solid foundations .. Help build impenetrable walls around ourselves ... So that way if or when something occurs that is beyond our control or outside our own EleMeNtALs ... Life coming to us at warped speed throTTLe shiFTing wOrLds ouTTa wHacK outta focus ... When at peace with oneself .... One would be LeSs inCLined2 feeL aTTacKeD (during these times ) understanding that there is no need 2strike back At full force .. . One would Be with much clearer FoCuS in regards to their feelings, and one would be able to set healthier intentions about how one chooses & is aBLE 2 exhibit and feel in cONTRoL ... Simply by choosing how 1 decides/chOoSes 2treat oTHerS... Especially during "trying" X's... During your own dark "TrAnSiTioNinG" moment(s) in2 <<>> <<>> just saying ... Definitely not spraying .. Or knocking ... Only sharing .. And loving my freedom to share whatever it is that I wish to share with you all. kiCkRocKs <~~ trust they can take it ...

They were built 4THaT !! So on that nOtE BLeSsiNgS 2 YoU aLL & know that i LOVE u2 the #MooN but FurTHeR !!!!

NeW aGe

Tonights moon

is about letting go, moving forward & gathering all that has been learned in our journeys & using this knowledge obtained to further enhance our own Lives.. Our own worlds. By ALLowing for our inner transformation to take FuLL form... how can we expect to grow within our selves if we are constantly looking over our own shouLders... Stagnant within our own structures within our own temples within our own homes ... unable to move forward cause we r 2 busy looking thru our rear view mirrors.. Expecting & Anticipating to find some sort of new found change in our lives ... Its not going to happen that way ... That's a contradictory belief system in itself & it sure is certainly Limiting ... Limiting on what one is capable of achieving & having ... Look at the moon Tonight (with new found eyes / fresh added perspective)

& just reflect on your own current placement in your own life .. At this current moment .. At this "Present" time & reaLLy be honest with YourSeLf about how and where and why things are as they are ... & ask yourself if ur really Happy .. & reALLy own up to your answer.. Some may not like what they hear .. That's ok too .. This is part of the process .. It's called "letting go" ... Where is it that you currently reside (u know way down deep inside ur waLLs) ..use this moment of (CLariTy) inner reflection (WiSDoM) ...to empower yourself with "YouR" truth.. Your "PeAcE" & using tonights moons energies

& understanding its symbolism/meaning & using the moons "concept" // "meaning" --fashion it to fit you.. Fit ur perspective .. Make this moment a representation of you & Who you are... Fitting your own style, needs & comfort .. Do something New .. For YoU.. Change Life.. (your Life) .. Acknowledge yourself .. Ur current Positioning in this world .. Ur current positioning From your world .. Your center. .. Are you balanced .. Are you happy .. Are you satisfied ... Are you angry .. Are you sad .. Lonely .. Depressed ... Own it .. Acknowledge it .. FeeL one last time of it .. Cry your eyes out if necessary ... Are you mad at anyone .. Are you angry with yourself .. Whatever it is .. Acknowledge it ... Make peace with it ... Throw it out there to the mooN... Make this full moon

 mean something for you... Make it memorable .. For You!!!! What do you stand to lose when all you are doing is allowing yourself to believe in YOU... You are LiMiTLeSs ... Get that through Your HeAD!!! . If you can think it & believe it .. Where there's a will there is a way ... You Can Have your hearts desires.. It is possible to be happy & at peace ... And if you can't seem 2 find it .. Well then change the way you are viewing it .. Ask new questions ... Find new answers ... Let what chooses to stay stuck .. Let it go ... & GrOw... It is about you .. Right ?!!! When you are right with yourself

it allows you to be fully functional within a society of different individuals who may be different then you, and a planet that may not be the most pleasant .. But you are at peace within ... And no matter the circumstance that one faces... When you are at peace within ... You are whole .. (Within your structure) And the root of your foundation is indestructible. You can't be shaken ... You were born to be haPPy

Give yourself every opportunity to be just that .. So that you too can bring much needed light into this world. Remember this day too ... So one day you can look back & remember what this day truly meant all those years ago... The importance of transformations... I say why not do it .. Go DeeP .. dEEp & DEePeR

& love urself so much so that u want to make a change .. You want what is best for you !!! honor you .. at this very moment in time... Go Ahead & reLease those buried rip tides currently causing you rockyWaVes... Be inTenTionAL with your ways for aLL of your DaYs here in The New Age.. YouR nEw aGE !!!

Ship WrecKed

NEvEr give UP.. They SaY.. Even when aLL hope seems Lost.. (& away) HoLd on Tighter, they cLaiM.. Things WiLL begin to LooK BriGHter.. soME dAy.. (Just Not 2daY) So they SaY.. Heyy!! BuT... HoLd on to that D.R.E.A.M... (Succeed) A momeNT 2beLiEVE.. (suPreME) When aLL hope SeeMs so LoSt (& GoNe) .. ReMemBer 2B BoLd (Be StronG) aLL you desire believed 2be True... Will soon be here right in front of you... (a promise) Well that's what they say... Anyway... WeLL fkn A! You FeEd Me WeLL.. Can't You TeLL.. (a LivinG HeLL) ... Ain't this sWeLL.. This LoOPty LoOp of a PoOptie PoOp....

(danCe) .. Man.. SpiRaLinG ouTTa ControL damnn.. aWaiTinG 4 itS sHoW 2stAnD.. Taking Me 2Forever Land... As long as I staY & PraY.. Making waY... (4) my... Lighter DayS.. Right this way.... Oh dear CapTain.. What in the WorLd is fkn happening... (I'm swimming & forever Lapping) .... FeeLinG HoPeLeSs & No longer AmuSed.. HeLpLeSs & fkn AbuSed.. UnTouChEd & so ConFuSed.. Scattered around in endLeSs TortuRe.. HauNteD... Taunted ... FLaunTed.. (I rupture) .. AttacheD 2uHeartLeSs ScoRcher...

Fkn teAse.. Simple sea BreeZe.. NiGhTmAres (BreeD) .. Inside of me... (But there is hope) ..

Can't you see .. there .. way down yonder.. (Visibly) Where dreams are made to plague intricately.. a wish in blooM... Manifesting DooM.. Flowers gLooM.. (Are you sure) Give me more .. CraVinGs sweep into my SLeep.. Distant shores.. A forever AMor FiLLing me with wanting more ... I walk the PLanK with sudden Speed.. SubMerGed too deep.. Drowning & weak ... Rescue Me or fkn leave me be ...

Hidden UnderToneS

I see you smile but your smile is distant & vague... You turn & look away ... You do not wish for me to see ... All your hidden misery ... Tucked deep inside .. I see thru Your Disguise ... You can not wear your mask near me .... Don't you see ...

This game of charades goes none of our ways ... Exploding desires ... 

Translucency wiRed so expressively inspired ... Understanding your every need ...

Trying to hide .. But with each night, a piece of you slowly dies.... ....... inside.... KiLLinG your DreamS..

Things left unSeen ... Little to no sleep .. Your mind busily debating.. SouL dissipating & Feeling heLpLeSS.. Feeling WreCkLeSs.. souL Shaker... dream HaTer... A souls cry bLinDs.. Hurting your heart Deep way inside ......

Deeply embedded in a sea filled with LieS.... Your heart It breaks & it breaks bad... Erosion LaNd ... You are EroDing... Self impLodinG... CenterFoLD... Outside of your home ... Always Alone...