UNCUT chant / More train rides .. Alice meets Monkey .. True story

Train rants .. Let's see what will i say .. I am not sure if I feel poetic at this very moment .. I would say more like there is this nervous, frantic like , excitement ... Exuding from every single pore in my body ..

It's like feel the rush ..

So instead let me document it ..

As I listen to my shuffle that sings it's Praises to me ..

Reconfirming all my Dreams Spoken out loud ...

Ride the train..
Feel the toxic fumes as u take it all in ..

Hmm.. Would u go unnoticed ..

As everyone sits / stands / breathes all around u ...

In this world do you go unnoticed ???

Is it possible to exist and not be seen ??

And when seen ..
Seen by whom ???

Rants / chants / what do they mean ??

Entering into a muffled existence putting together all the puzzle pieces and deciphering which road / path / movement / dance to do next ..

What are ur choices ???

For they are our own ..

Or so we believe ..

Illusions/disillusionments

All the same ..

Interpretation ..

Well it's a matter of vision .. Ain't it .. Hate that word .. Choices ..
Purposely used .. Why ..

A monkey sits before me ..

Perception..

What world is he in at this very moment ..

Seen ?!??!!!!!!!

I see him ..
He doesn't see me ..

Monkey ..
Where r u ??
U hang ur head low .. Fidget with ur belongings ..

Do u love u ..

Why hang so low ..

Where r u ..

Hi, I am Alice !!

Welcome to wonderland ..
Would u like for me to be ur guide ??

Love .. What is that u love ..

Self ??

Most important .. Although we are fed to believe that to do such things ahold make us selfish ..

But I ask u Monkey ..
U sit here hang head low ..
Lost somewhere inside urself ..
Dreaming to break.
Free ?!?!
Do u love urself ??

Now..
Monkey .. Raise ur head ..

Wow.. Monkey .. U have beautiful eyes ..

Beautiful .. Most exquisite ..
Here .. Look (as I hand Monkey my phone with camera open to self reflect )

Look at those eyes Monkey ..

They are beautiful ...

Can YOU see Monkey ???

(Monkey 1/2 smiles )

Monkey that is the first step ..

Chant/rant/retrospect/reflect/introspect/accept/protect/embrace/love

Monkey ..
See the beauty through ur eyes ..

Only way I swear .. I'm
Alice, Monkey, I AM ALICE.. I Swear & i repeat!!!

I do not lie ..

Ok Monkey.. Look around .. What do ur Beautiful eyes SEE ???

Truly truly truly truly
Practice practice practice practice
Try try try try try try try
BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE BELIEVE
Trust trust trust trust trust trust trust trust
Faith faith faith FAITH faith faith

Do you SEE now ..

First step ..
First step..
First step..

Staircases will present themselves in all due time ...

First step.:

monkey ...
I LOVE YOU!!!!

Did you hear me ??!

I LOVE YOU !!!!

Alice the most sincere , honest , loving , believer you will ever meet ...


You met me for a reason ..

Monkey .. I saw u ..

And by me seeing You..

You now could see urself ...

First step ..

Let go of the staircase ..

In all due time
.. Remember


Time optical illusion ..

Let that go too ..

Ur focus ..
Only on belief ..

That's ur job ...

Fk escalators too ...
They go too fast ..
enjoy each Step ..

Each step is an ultimate discovery ..

Layer upon layer

Unfolding ...

Yield to the folds ...

But remember Monkey ..

Smile/love/appreciate/try/believe/LOVE/Smile/LOVE

LOVE urself first !!!

U hang low cause u don't love ..

U don't love YOU!

I tell u monkey ..

I am Alice .. & I LOVE you..

Ur fkn awesome ...

At least I know so ..

Do you know ..

Well today either way  is the first step into u now realizing that
For urself ..

Well Monkey .. This is my stop now .. For I must go ..
Omg MONKEY I am so fkn happy that I met u ..

U are AMAZING ...

I will think of you ..

And I hope to see you again ..

And next time I might not recognize u at first .. For don't feel bad .. It would be because you will be Hanging HIGH.. I swear .

I'm Alice.. And I licked a mushroom ..

I know what I say ..

You will be Hanging high ..

And then when I SEE..

I would say ooohhh Monkey .. U evolved !!!!

amazing !!!

Well monkey it was an absolute pleasure ...

This was a most magnificent Train ride Uncut Chant

Blessings

Why

Why.........




Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....


Uuuuuuuuuuuuuu....





HeeeeeRrrrrreeeeeeeee


???????????

Uncut chant ~ connections

Think of it this way..
This connection..
These coincidences ..
Even if they are not directly linked ..
Well.. In our understandable minds eye..
It still is a universal connection..
One that didn't have to be made..
But yet was..
Why ??
Now that is the question!!!

Uncut chant ~ more train ride rants .. Where is my mind lol

Compelled to write .. About what ?? Who the fk knows .. But my spirit within just acknowledges the love within, bursting out into every landscape created before me...

And as I write this my shuffle plays ... And he sings to me ... Reminding me of the fantasy ... Everything about my existence breathes into his.. Connecting every dynamic part of our souls intertwining it into everything we are meant to be....

Forever  ...

I write and know not what I am going to say ..
But yet the words overflow and pour onto my world..

Reminding me..
Awakening my very soul ..

My thoughts ...
My expressions ..
My fantasies ...

Those things are indeed tangible ...
These very things in which I believe are mine for the taking ...

My heart skips beats ..

And everything in between all the dreams of past lives .. All future occurrences .. Are wheeling in to this time ..

My time ..

This moment ...

The fantasy

By simple uncovering our worlds collide

unleashing  what has always been..

Ours..

Rude awakening..
Wait..

What am I saying ??!?

Where do these words lead ...

Who's heart is singing out loud ..

What the fk am I talking about ?

Alice, where are you ??

Muffled silences ..

Disturbia ..

Uncut chant / train rides .. Meh!

Independent as I am,
Prideful as I can be ..
& I still can not seem to erase this profound effect u have on me ...
Wiser than most fools I've never gotten lost in the hype ..
But what the fk is it about u ..
That I desire u in my life ...
How could this be possible for I am in complete control  ..

Or at least until now ...

Why does everything unreal feel ever so right...

reality failing to match up with this description..

placed in my heart in my heart in my head  ..

I know fantasy ..
I fkn know the difference ..
What kind of woman do you take me for...

Dreamer Dances awake In many a realm but dizzy feet always in touch with earthly reality..

I've been plagued with enough insanity to last me many a lifetime ..

So, I ask myself why,  why this fkn time...

Warrior of love engulfed in flames..
Spellbound?

Enchantment scrolls laid out  on the ground ...

You put a spell on me!!

uncut Rant/Chant ~~ #WtfIsBeauty ..

Why do I #WtfisBeauty

????

Good question..

Wtf is beauty ? And why should it be compared ? Who is doing the comparison ? Who is providing the meaning, the definition to its very significance ??? Wtf is beauty ???

And why are so many in this world wandering around not feeling BEAUTIFUL ????!

Hold on .. I want to know the definition of beauty .. I want to know what the word itself is defined as...

Ok a quick copy/paste (courtesy of my iPhone (which I still love btw.. I know it's just "technology" & I know that my "reliance" on this "thing" is ridiculous .. But wth whatever !! Lol

Here's googles definition of BEAUTY ..

We all google right ? Do u google ? Or wait is that me just assuming .. I wouldn't want to assume.. So anyways .. I use google (not that this is any form of advertisement for Google either .. I am only revealing one version of "beauty's" source/origin ..

Ok shhh.. ( that was to myself ) I try to take advantage with these rants & type on my keypad like a thousand words per minute .. Cause I am honestly trying to capture / via technology  every "understandable" thought process passing thru my head at these very moments I really like the concept of raw .. Too many a times we hide the raw (idk I guess in some fear .. Multitude of possibilities where that fear can stem from .. Rejection .. Idk .. Anyways .. Everyone is their own Captain.. ) 

Reject me ..
Ha! That's fine ..
For I will still always be.. ME!!
& I am In LOVE finally .. With who I am..
And I sleep well at night .

(Figure of speech.. Cause we all know .. Well if u know me.. I don't sleep .. Well In the traditional sense .. Blah blah meh Jennifer shut up..

Lol

Beauty .. Google.. Definition ...

1.
a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, esp. the sight.
"I was struck by her beauty"
antonyms: ugliness
denoting something intended to make a woman more attractive.
modifier noun: beauty
Ex...."beauty products"
2.
a beautiful or pleasing thing or person, in particular.
Ex... a beautiful woman.

Hmm..
Pleases the aesthetic senses ...
What's that ??
Well I know what aesthetic means ..
But I'm obsessive compulsive so I want to chop this 1 down to size ..

Because that's what we humans do .. Dissect .. Inspect ... Retrospect ..

List goes
On & on
With the things each of us do .. When we want to do .. :))

Well anyways ..
Let's borrow googles definition again ..

Aesthetic ..
 

& if u r reading this ..
Please what is written up above .. U know there under Aesthetics ..
Everything I wrote in the < > is NOT .. I repeat NOT googles definition of the word aesthetic ..


Ok .. Google . My dog is bothering me .. Distractions .. Minor irritations.. Think good thoughts.. Love my dog .. He's so handsome ... Awww he makes the most adorable pups.. Omg he is so annoying .. lol

Ok ..
Google .. Definition.. (Not mine ).. Google.. Aesthetics..

adjective
1.
concerned with beauty or the appreciation of beauty.
"the pictures give great aesthetic pleasure"
noun
noun: aesthetic; plural noun: aesthetics; noun: esthetic; plural noun: esthetics
1.
a set of principles underlying and guiding the work of a particular artist or artistic movement.
"the Cubist aesthetic"


I know I get lost in the movement with the voice of my words
And the sounds in my mind
All intertwined
These words written all over the place
Scattered race
Be glad you have the option of reading ..

Imagine that if I were talking to u right now about anything.. ANYTHING that I was thinking about .. Because we were together in some sort of conversation ... Sometimes I have my moments .. I will admit .. (Whatever blow me lol ) I can talk a whole in ur head .. And ring out ur ears with .. I will call it enchantments .. Lol but yes I have a lot to say .. My mind is always on warp turbo speed .. And I find many many many many things fascinating .. And I like to share / talk / write about it ..

I don't know what compels / drives me to do the very things that I do ..
Constantly .. Since young .. Writing .. Reading.. Dancing ..acting ..  Blah and blah .. It's just there .. Always taking action.. Performing shit for me ..
Sort of like what people call multiple personalities .. Or blended multiple personalities .. Whatever .. And we all should do the things we love .. And I love writing / talking to anyone who is willing to listen as well as engage In some fun / dynamic / thought provoking / stimulating conversation ...

Don't get me wrong .
I am not everyone's cup of tea ..
We all have our preferences ..
That's cool ..
I won't bother u ..
Unless we are friends .. Like really good friends .. Like inner circle .. Well then u have no choice but to always hear my chants ..

Awww my inner posse .
I love each & every single one of them to pieces ...

It's funny too cause I am never insulted when I put people to sleep when I talk .. Because I understand ur tired & usually most likely it is very very late .. I still finish for the most part what it is that I have to say anyway .. Lol

We record .. Ok (I) record a lot of conversations .. (Amongst friends) I tell them about it.. I just never say when .. It's funny when we talk about certain things & it's being recorded & no one knows (except me of course ) & when all is said & done .. I'm like ta..da.. It's recorded .. Everyone wants to kill me .. With love of course .. But it's funny .. I would never expose those .. It's more for memorabilia .. These are those good moments .. Those wonderful moments .. Uncut / raw / funny / and BEAUTIFUL..

Hmm.. Beauty ..

Yes exactly ..


Guess Alice wandered off again  ..

Beauty / aesthetics ..

Where was I going with that ..
Hmm..
Let me go bk & read definitions .. See where my thoughts take me ..

Ok ..
Senses.. What are senses..

Google..
Drum roll please ..

Senses..
a faculty by which the body perceives an external stimulus; one of the faculties of sight, smell, hearing, taste, and touch.
2. a feeling that something is the case.
3. (Verb) perceive by a sense or senses.

Wow I love the verb definition really makes sense .. If u know what sense means .. How would u describe sense .. Try googles verb way .. Cause really that shit sucks .. What kind of definition is that lol senses are senses 0.O

How about senses  are a subjective Personal Self experience that involves the 5 senses (sight, smell, hearing, taste & touch) along with an inner personal choice as to what one perceives to "feel" about all one encounters and experiences within their  lifetime..

Lol

Even I baffle myself sometimes lol
I just re-read that & I promise I left all as it was originally written ..

Uncut remember ..

Ok ..

So from "my" understanding from all these definitions is that beauty is perceived subjectively ...

Hmm..
Ok subjectively ..
But we live in a world that objectifies BEAUTY.. When beauty itself is not tangible ( in theory .. Bigger picture .. ) it can only be perceived ?? Wait did I even write that right ?? I know what I mean just not sure if I wrote it right ..

An artist paints a picture
A singer sings a song
A mother combs her child's hair
A magazine prints an article on 50 of the WORLD's most BEAUTIFUL people
A director finishes his film
A dancer dances a song

When the artist paints his picture.. He does it with a fiery passion .. He loves what he is doing .. His master piece is his beautiful creation ..

I think his painting is atrocious & notice that it also brings up intense feelings of bile building in my digestive tract & I feel like vomiting at this most ugh! Repulsive "art"...

Singer sings his song.. Sings it all day long .. Records his record album. Heart, soul & Passion went into this work of musical expression.. Album drops .. Another version of art being expressed...

Is it beauty?
To the singer it is ..

News update .. 1 month later Album flops from sales to stops ..

Wait expressionism ..
The word itself employs artist ..
Express.. - art .. All things associated with beauty ..

Expression it is the very thing that awakens our senses ..

Someone's expression that gets our attention ignites an audience display
& WE the audience decide (Subjectively) what we "see" <1 5="" of="" senses="" the=""> What we "hear" <1 5="" of="" senses="" the=""> what we "feel" <1 5="" of="" senses="" the=""> .. U get my drift (listed 3 of the 5) 
I'm fkn tired .. But need to finish this .. & I fkn talk a lot / write a lot / think a lot .. Need sleep lol


This mother combs her daughters hair for school. She tells her daughter she is beautiful (awww sweet ) the 7 year old little girl feeling beautiful gets to school only to be called ugly by other students.

Hey did u know this same little girl cuts herself & also hates herself because she doesn't feel beautiful ....  


Or what she is told is beautiful ..
Oh how her own perspective "subconsciously" warps her mind based on these "hurtful" most "traumatic" experiences that even this beautiful 7 year old girl now believes that what she is / who she is / everything she is / is not beautiful...

(Sorry had to hone in on that one there )

Millions / billions / Trillions Magazines sold through out the world depicting beauty .. Style .. Fashion .. BEAUTY ..

Did we all miss something here ??

Was there a consensus with the entire world that we All missed where it became agreed upon that we would accept & believe that whatever we are sold / & told is beauty .. We accept as "Truth" ???

That we then all begin comparing and contrasting ..



One against the other ..

Even if the comparisons are done subconsciously or internally..

From within comes
Without

Instead of loving ..
We are all Sizing one another up ..

??!??

A director directs a film ..
The film Makes it into the movie theaters ..
Movie gets rave rave reviews ..
I watch the movie ..
I think it sucks ..

Or switch it ..
The movie flops ..
By critics (1 persons perspective ) & because of the review many other people don't go see this film as they originally planned .. So they do not really know .. But they predetermined their own "future " "feeling " experience .. Based solely on a critiques review of the film.


Dancer auditions
Dances the Dance of her soul.
Beauty conquering Beats..
She's beautiful ..

But she doesn't make the cut ..

Why ??

One persons perception & decision making process determines this dancers fate ..

She says there was no beauty in this dancers dance ...

Is that so ?? Or was that just her account of what she perceived to be true ???

Wtf is beauty ??

It is a personal opinion ..

Is your perception of beauty tainted by the worlds perception of beauty ??

Do you look at yourself in amazement & honor your own beauty by recognizing your own contribution to art & expression in this world ....

YOU ARE BEAUTY ...

You are everything you believe
You are !!!!!

From within exudes without ..

Don't forget that when it concerns aesthetics everything is subjective & personal for each and every individual.

And just because we are sold by a market that has us conditioned to believe otherwise, doesn't mean we have to fall prey ...

You shouldn't be made to feel any less beautiful ...

There are no comparisons ..
Only personal preferences ..

But we should first all truly learn how to accept Our own infrastructure & landscape ..

Once you accept & really believe and  see the beauty in yourself ... EVERYTHING else around you is appreciated wholeheartedly for the wonderful beauty that it brings  into your world.

"Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it." Confucius

Let's change that ..

Love yourself ..
Like really truly love urself

"The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with  the heart." Helen Keller

So if beauty is truly something that has to be seen to be perceived .. Are blind people not capable of experiencing or understanding beauty ??? If beauty could be heard .. Are deaf people not allowed to hear/understand  the sound of beauty ??

How would you know .. Are you too incapable of hearing ??? Does that make it incomprehensible ???

Wtf is beauty ..

Beauty is what is aesthetically pleasing to you .. And somewhere deeper way passed your five senses there is the core .. The heart of the matter ..

Heart ...
Beauty...
Beauty / heart
Beauty exists from the heart
Heart exudes beauty
Beauty is of the heart ...

Or maybe just maybe...

in the heart is where  Beauty is Born ...


Well this concludes this rant / chant ..

Did I discover anything new.. Who knows I will read this shit bk 2 myself in the morning ...

Of course I will leave all that is .. As is .. Even when I am tempted to delete .. Lol

Wait .. Yes I did learn something ..

These words .. My words .. My blog ..

It's beautiful <3 nbsp="" p="">
Ta-da and just like that beauty is born  ...

Ok it's really really late
If I am lucky I will sleep 2-3 hrs and feel as if I slept 100 hours in the morning ...

If you read all the way down to this very line .. I wonder about you ..

Lol .. No like seriously I like wonder about u..

Have we met before ?? Lol

What brought you here ??

Anyway..  I am truly grateful for whatever compelled u to read .. Even if by the time you reach this part you say .. "This is stupid" ok .. That's fine too.. But even if u don't see .. Somewhere deep Inside ur subconscious a seed has been planted .. What it will grow Into , well that is entirely up to you ..

& either way .. THANK YOU for your most precious precious time & momentary undivided attention ...

May peace , Love , joy , Happiness &  BEAUTY surround EVERY part of your existence ..

Namaste. ;)

WonderDaze

Is it possible that this time
Around

U are actually

SEEing me

For the first time ?!